Meditation Journal Entry #11: Overstimulated

It seems to be happening more and more often that life throws more things at me than I can handle all at once. Instead of feeling 1-2 emotions I’m feeling 7-8. Now, all of it has me feeling like Edvard Munch’s “Scream” here.

I have my first Finite Math test this Friday and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t stressing the heck out. I’m beyond afraid that, no matter how much study, I won’t do well. At the same time, I’m aware that stressing out makes me forget things which stresses me out even more. Negativity also hangs over me like a guillotine at this point. 

I’m angry because at least 3 people have misunderstood/judged me in the past few days and I can’t really change their thinking.

Never in all my years did I imagine having to iron a suit for my dad to wear to a job interview, but that was yesterday evening and I’m thrilled but too overwhelmed to express it. 

I haven’t slept enough in several days so I’m mentally and physically exhausted but have no time to rest because I have so much work to do for university.

Basically, busy life is an understatement, but as iiSuperwomanii says, “Busy is a blessing.” I’m going to hold onto that as I work through things because I believe that it is. I remember when I was younger I could only dream of making sacrifices to chase a higher purpose. Going to bed after a long day seemed like something only artists and writers would do. I’m happy to be where I am. I’m happy to be fighting for a larger cause, I’m happy to not have all the answers, I’m happy to feel so alive.

I wouldn’t trade this for anything.

~Live boundless


17 thoughts on “Meditation Journal Entry #11: Overstimulated

  1. I hope things get better for you. Take it from someone who’s been there, ignore and stay away from the people who judge you. You don’t need to waste your time on people who don’t really know you. If it’s a good friend doing this, you need to talk to her about it. It’s uncomfortable and might be hurtful to her at first, but if she’s your friend she’ll understand. Just say how when she does so and so, how it makes you feel. Best of luck with your tests, school can be stressful at times but all you can do us your best. Get some sleep to, that’s just as important to doing well. Cheers 💕🎈

    Liked by 1 person

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